Wow, I can hardly believe that it's almost been 5 months since my last blog. So much has changed since my last post. I've sadly fallen back into the American way and gotten used to all of its luxuries once again. Part of me hates that I've let myself get comfortable with how life is here. While I'm being honest, I guess I could just throw something else out there: I've been avoiding my blog. It may sound ridiculous, but it's the absolute truth. Reliving the memories of the greatest adventure of my life is something I wasn't ready for. About a month ago, I wrote down a blog that i had full intention of posting, but for whatever reason, I couldn't get the strength to sign in. It's been really hard to think back about everything that happened and all the incredible people that I met without having to remember the realization that they're all several thousand miles away and I'm not sure when I'm going to get to see them again. While saying my goodbyes, it was so easy to say that "I'd try to be back as soon as possible." But making it happen is so difficult. It's like being between a rock and a hard place. I'm here with all of my family friends that I love, but at the same time I'm missing out on my "other family" and friends that I love. The fact that life is still going on there without me is a hard thing to swallow.
Since I've gotten back, a few things have happened. Less than a month after I got back to the states, I got what I thought to be my dream job, using a certification that I got in high school, taking care of an 87 year old lady. My fourth day on the job, she sent me to Wal-Mart. On the way back, I was going down a road that I had gone down several times in my life, it was just another day on the same road and then--BAM: a car pulled out in front of me and I was involved in my very first wreck. Everything was going in slow motion. I was in complete shock. Because I had just gotten back in the country, I didn't have my own car yet and I had been borrowing my grandfather, but to run errands, I had borrowed Ms. Dunson's car. It was totaled. It's funny how things work out sometime. After things had calmed down a bit (meaning after I quit screaming... haha), I realized that the family that was in the car that I hit were Hispanic, and they didn't speak English! It was so amazing to be able to talk to them in their language and make sure they were ok.
My job is very fun and how everything worked out with getting it, there's no doubt that it just had to be the hand of God. I'm still working for Ms. Dunson, and she's been teaching me so many things. Sometimes when I'm working I'll imagine myself back in Paraguay. Washing dishes or cooking, talking to Caroline and Camille and them making fun of me :) So many times I want to say that I've been so guapa that day, but no one understands that here but me... bummer. ;)

Anyway, the Lord has definitely watched over me lately. I was able to buy a car that is payed off! (Yay God!) And I'm still able to keep in touch with Paraguayan friends. The big question everyone wants to know is when I'll be returning to Paraguay. I'm still not entirely sure when that can be. I would absolutely love to get back ASAP to see everyone, but on the other hand, if I decided to go back on a little more of a long-term situation, I want make sure that I do everything like I should and I'd like to take some bible classes also. That brings me to my next thought: I've been thinking about taking some courses for Christian ministry. I think online would be great, but I'm not sure if I'd commit to more of a classroom setting. So keep that in your prayers!

I guess I'll close this blog out for now, and I'll definitely try to commit to blogging more from now on. God bless.

Being Back

I've noticed myself getting more and more used to the lifestyle of being back in the US, and it makes me extremely sad. A few weeks ago, I was using a clothes dryer as opposed to a clothes line, for the first time in 6 months, and that taking a hot shower, that didn't require flipping a switch to turn the electric shower head on to make the water hot. 

I'm still getting asked if I'm excited to be back, and how I'm adjusting, and I'm still not sure exactly how to answer it all. I guess the best way to put it into words being 100% honest: I'm a different person. I don't know that I'll ever be fully adjusted, or excited as I could be, to be back.  In saying that, I do not mean at all that I'm not extremely happy to see my family and church family and friends again. But life has a different meaning. 

Tonight, Allisha and I spoke to the church about our trip experience, and it was so incredible to be able to show pictures and talk about what happened in Paraguay. Of course, just seeing the photos and hearing the stories, don't completely serve it justice, and none of them may ever know the people or the lifestyle of Paraguay as I have got to know it, but now they have a little piece of what goes on in a country that a lot of people don't even know exist. 

My past couple of Sundays (and some nights during the week) have been spent with the Spanish congregation of my Church. It still feels so surreal having complete conversations with them in Spanish, and they have really given me a confidence boost in being impressed with how fast I was able to pick up the language.